Seeking God

Ahhh, a quiet moment! Charlie is at three school, Ruby is at school and Tabatha is napping. I am drinking coffee and reading, what a joy! It has been way to long since I did this. It is amazing how a peaceful hour can really turn my perspective around.

I woke up feeling drained. It has a been a long month with my children. Tabatha cut four molars and had a cold and ear infection, Ruby has a cold (which she doesn't handle well) and now Charlie has a sinus infection and double ear infection. Yuck! This all results in crabby kids, less sleep and more behavior problems. I have been feeling frustrated and crabby as a result.  Several times in this last month I have asked myself, "Am I losing control of my children?" "Do I have any idea what I am doing?"  Anyone else ever felt like this?

In church the past couple of weeks we have been encouraged to strive to have a more intimate, personal relationship with Christ. Our pastors have pushed us to see Jesus as a mentor, someone who is continually shaping us and directing our lives.

I have not spent enough time in God's word lately, but this morning I used the reading suggestions in our church bulletin and read Psalm 32.  Verse 7 and 8 really hit me. David describes God as His hiding place and then God says, "I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go. I will counsel you and watch over you."

Why does it always take me so long to go to God when I am feeling tired? Why do I always try to do things on my own? God promises to protect me and "surround me with songs of deliverance"! He says He will counsel me and give me wisdom and strength.  I NEED his wisdom and strength. I CANNOT do this alone. Sorry, Father, for the times I try to push you out of the driver's seat.

I want God directing my life.

Abba, give me the feet to walk the path you have for me and humility to turn to you when I don't feel like I have the strength to take the next step.

Quiet time with God has a way of putting life into perspective; I need to do this more often.